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posted by Weird Menace in Off Topic

BE MY VALENTINE...OR SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES!!!!!

January 2, 2013

Oh miserable earthlings, you didn't think the holidays were over, did you?

Sure, you spent every nickel in your accounts on gifts for your “loved ones,” and you probably got...what, a necktie? A new wallet for your exhausted credit cards? A leaf blower?

Well, just in case you thought you were done showing your affection, the next Holy Day is on its way, and you'd better have more overwhelming gift ideas for those less-than-stellar gift-givers in your life.

If you're “lucky” enough to have a lady-earthling in your life, males, then be prepared to suffer almost daily reminders that your upcoming sacrifice to the bow-hunting cherub is coming, like a looming battle of affection on some kind of emotional D-day.

But this year, why not turn the tables on her? Buy some stuff and wrap it in pink and red and put it in a conspicuous place. Beat her to the punch. It will not only unnerve her, it will be a daily reminder that she hasn't purchased that Hallmark card for you yet, and will drive her up the wall with curiosity from now until then.

After all, V-day should be fun for us as well, and driving them insane is what we do best.

But oh my goodness, ain't they worth it!

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